Maybe it's "Hunters are never more than 3 feet from spiders." Or vice versa. But that would be the same thing, wouldn't it?

You know what they say: You're never more than three feet away from a hunter. Or is that a spider? I hope it's not "You're never more than three feet from a spider," because that means that right now a spider could be looking at me and imagining how it's going to later, while I sleep, drop in my mouth.

If it's "you're never more than three feet from a HUNTER," though, that would be cool because I then could take full advantage of the Nikon Hunting Christmas Promotion and give that hunter an awesome gift -- the Ultimate Hunter's Package from Nikon that includes a ProStaff rifle scope, a ProStaff 550 Rangefinder, and a DVD on how to master the Nikon BDC reticle. Any hunter would be sure to appreciate that -- and Nikon is offering other great deals, too, including excellent prices on a variety of riflescopes, and binoculars-- and they're offering free gift cards, of up to $50 in value, with the purchase of Nikon Monarch, Trailblazer, Action 10x50, and any Nikon ATB Binoculars.

I plan on buying LOTS of presents for the hunters in my life -- so that they'll use them to protect me from those spiders.