They even have wingtips. Whatever those are.

I've got this theory:

You can tell a lot about a person just by the name of the type of footwear they have on. Run into someone wearing a "flip-flop," and you'll expect them to be kind of wishy-washy and meek. Someone wearing a clog is likely to be dense and stubborn. And someone wearing a "Croc?" I'll leave that to your imagination.

If my theory is widely accepted, (and why WOULDN'T it be?) then everyone's going to want to start shopping for Wolverine Boots, don't you think? That name... it's so tough and inspiring. A Wolverine-wearing person could easily beat up someone walking around in "Chuck Taylors." And that's even before you see or know anything about the boots.

Then, if you go check out the Wolverine Boots for reals at MetBoots, you find out that they're even tougher-looking than they sounded: all leather and thick soles and strong strings and clips and clasps and pulls and stuff. The kind of boots worn by real men: Lumberjacks, carpenters, guys who work outside and with their hands and tools and stuff. Guys who wear flannel and don't look like dorks doing it.

MetBoots is even having a holiday sale right now -- 10% off your order with the code on their site, so you can get yourself some tough boots and save a little money, too.

As for me, I'll just keep on keepin' on with my... um... moccassins. But they're business moccassins.