Tuesday, April 26, 2011

1001 Ways To Tune Up The World, Number Seventy-Six

76. Accept tennis shoes.

Styles don't have to be fixed immutably in stone. I have two pairs of dress shoes, one black, one brown. Neither of them is what I'd call comfortable. My black shoes are okay, but they're not as warm as I'd like and they're expensive and look crummy when they get a little wet. The brown shoes are uncomfortable to wear (but look nice) and I always mean to replace them with a pair that's at least comfortable, but I always forget to do that.

The reason the brown shoes are uncomfortable is kind of a mystery. They're not too small or too big. I think it's that they won't get broken in; they're as stiff and new-seeming as the day I bought them, three years ago. And also I kind of think it's psychological. I've never liked the brown shoes, and my mind is powerful enough to make my feet hurt because of that, to encourage me to go get a new pair of shoes.

But why do I have "dress shoes" at all? Why can't we wear shoes that actually support our feet and have cushion and traction and are comfortable to wear and breathe... in short, why can't we just wear sneakers. They could be nice looking tennis shoes; dress codes could mandate that they be clean and without holes (although our office dress code, rarely enforced, doesn't mandate clean shoes) and they could (roughly?) match our outfits -- and peoples' feet would hurt less, and people might smile a little more.

As a society, you know, we can agree that anything is acceptable. As I've pointed out before, we could as a society just agree that we're not going to work Fridays, or that we'll wear clothes that are comfortable. This seems like a pretty easy place to start: Let's let people wear comfortable shoes.

Prior entries:

13. Ban driving any kind of automobile, motorcycle or other personal vehicle within 1-2 miles of downtown in any city with a population of more than 100,000.

12. Abolish gym class; instead, teach kids to play musical instruments.

11. Change copyright laws to allow anyone to use anyone else's creative work provided that the copier pay 60% of the profit to the originator and that the copier not cast the original work in a negative light.

10. Have more sidewalk cafes and outdoor seating.

9. When you have to give someone a gift, ask them what they want, and then get that thing for them.

8. Never interrupt or finish someone's jokes.

7. Periodically, give up something you like for at least a month.

6. Switch to "E-money."

5. Have each person assigned one phone number, and then add an extension for the various phones and faxes that person might be reached at.

4. Abolish Mondays and Tuesdays.

3. Don't listen to interviews with athletes or comedians.

2. Have "personal cashiers" at the grocery store.

1. Don't earn more than $200,000 per year.

Is this working? You bet --

1001 Ways also helped change the world here!


1001 Ways also helped change the world here!

1 comment:

Rogue Mutt said...

My Hush Puppies aren't bad as long as I don't try to walk miles in them. Not that sneakers are much more comfortable with my crappy hammertoes.