Sunday, September 04, 2011


Just sixteen days from when I may take a bite of the Twinkie, and while SCIENCE marches on, it marches on imperceptibly, at least so far as I can tell. Here's the Twinkie today, still bravely soldiering despite the fact that it is forced to live in close proximity to Control Group, who also is still bravely soldiering on despite having been accidentally cut in half by one of my Experiments of SCIENCE:

Time for observations:

1. When I took that picture, I had not yet changed my desk calendar over from August to September.

2. I've done that now.

3. My desk calendar used to be my wall calendar, but one day Mr F tried to climb behind my desk, perhaps because he was doing some SCIENCE of his own, and he popped the wall calendar off the wall, and now I can only find one of the push pins necessary to hold up the wall calendar, so I've made it a desk calendar.

4. I did not even find the pushpin when I cleaned my office last week.

5. The Twinkie, which really is the point of this experiment, and which I'm supposed to be Observationing right now, isn't doing anything.

So let's expose it to some MORE SCIENCE via EXPERIMENTS:

Here is the Twinkie with its original guardian, Wind-Up Chicken, and although I didn't plan it this way, the picture was made somewhat more exciting/SCIENTIFIC by the fact that it is, inexplicably, sideways and I cannot figure out how to rotate it.

Note that the Twinkie's texture is completely unchanged. There is no mold on the Twinkie, and it looks the same as it ever did. It's hard to the touch, but otherwise has not changed at all.

I think it's mummified.

Other EXPERIMENTS: What would the Twinkie do if it were attacked by a dinosaur and the atmosphere made everything seem old-timey? Let's find out:

The Twinkie would play dead until the dinosaur went away.

Supplemental observations of SCIENCE:

1a. The Twinkie is exhibiting signs of intelligent behavior, as demonstrated in that last EXPERIMENT.

1b. I don't know why I bother coming into my office on Sundays if I'm not going to do anything productive.

1c. Although if I only came to the office when I was going to be productive, I would not be employed anymore. Or I would be employed but I would never come into the office.

1d. I have pixie sticks in my office. Just thought I'd mention that.

Has it really been 21 days since I last checked in on the Twinkie? Seems so: here's day 63.

1 comment:

anna. said...

closing in on day #100...secretly can't wait for you to try it. here's hoping you don't die of sugar poisoning or something equally terrible.