Wednesday, November 18, 2009

If you read to the end, you'll understand the pictures. (Taking Stock: The Excess Snacks Drawer.)

Taking Stock is my attempt to inventory my life, one category at a time. Today it's the Excess Snack Drawer.

Note: Usually I put a photo of the stock up, but my cell phone broke* (*was dropped in a cup of coffee by Mr Bunches) and I don't have a camera with me, so I'll put a picture up when I get a chance. If I remember. Maybe.

I have a lot of rules in life (as you know already) and one of those rules is that lunch has three courses:

1. The sandwich course.
2. The noodle course.
3. The chips course, which is sometimes the fruit course.

(And a soda.)

The sandwich course can be filled with sandwiches, or burritos, or pizza, or perhaps leftover casserole (like today, when I had leftovers of last night's dinner, a dinner that Sweetie had written on our "Meal List" as: Noodles & Meat. And it was. That was the exact dish. It was delicious, but Sweetie will never be hired as a menu copywriter.)

The noodle course can be filled with Ramen Noodles (preferable) or other noo
dle-based filler. It should not be filled with chips, because that's the chips course.

The chips course used to be filled with "anything that ends in -ito," but then I was forced to get healthier by The Boy, who a year or so ago announced that from now on, he wanted to try to cut down on snacks and eat more fruits and vegetables, and so he requested that we buy fewer snacks and more fruits and vegetables. Pleased, I agreed we'd do that, because I want our family to be healthy and I wanted to encourage him in his health. The Boy then never actually ate the fruits and vegetables, opting instead to use his money to go out to eat. Meanwhile, I've tried to stick with the fruits and vegetables, mostly because we don't have as many snacks in the house.

This is all leading into why I have an "Excess Snack Drawer" at work. When Sweetie makes my lunches, she sometimes messes up the categories, or throws in too much, adding in extra categories to make up for what she perceives as a deficiency. For example, this month, I've given up bread (because of this), so Sweetie hasn't been gi
ving me sandwiches. Because that makes the lunch look skimpy to her, she throws in all kinds of other things.

I don't complain about her doing that, because why would I? She makes the lunches out of the goodness of her heart, and does a great job of it, and also, people who complain about someone trying to do something nice for them deserve to be punished in unusual ways, like maybe making them spend 15 minutes stuck in an elevator with Philip Seymour Hoffman (who always looks to me as though he might smell, just a little).

Instead of complaining, I take the stuff that's excess or doesn't fit into the lunch category, and put it in the Excess Snacks Drawer in my desk, a drawer I rely on from time to time when I forget to grab my pocket breakfast (like I did yesterday) or just get hungry (like I do every day...)

Now, today, I have taken out the contents of the Excess Snack Drawer and will list them. They are:

4 bags of microwave popcorn, two brand-name, twe generic. (We have tons of microwave popcorn in our house, stemming from my ill-conceived Costco experiment.)
5 Pop-tarts -- 3 generic and 2 name-brand. (Flavors: Fudge, wild berry, and 3 Blueberry.)
2 bite-sized Almond Joys.
2 Nature Valley granola bars, one peanut butter, one "oats 'n honey." (There were 3 but I ate one yesterday.)
1 package of "Club & Cheddar" crackers.
1 bite-sized Hershey's bar.
1 bite-sized M&M Minis.

Also, I have the cassette tape versions of Paul Simon's You're The One album, the
Armageddon soundtrack, Green Day's Nimrod , and "Celtic Bagpipes: The Lifescapes Collection." I actually just put that last one into my Backstreet Boys' boom box and now I'm jamming out.

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