Friday, March 20, 2009

Blackmailing Matt, 1:


My brother Matt just turned 38, and I found out that he got a gift certificate for an indoor surfing lesson as part of his birthday present.

Aside from the amazing fact that we live in a time when someone can say "Yeah, I went surfing at the mall" and the listener will nod and say "That's cool," instead of "What you just said made no sense, person from the future," the other thing that should be noted about Matt's birthday present is that he used it, and wiped out, apparently badly and embarrasingly, and when I asked if there was video of the wipeout, Matt said there was but he wouldn't post it because he doesn't want to be embarrassed on the Internet.

I told Matt I would use every resource at my disposal to get him to post that video, and so I am doing just that, and hence, beginning today, I am instituting Blackmailing Matt, in which I will periodically post embarrassing (and potentially true) facts about Matt, and will continue doing so until Matt posts that video.

You can help: this is the link to his Facebook profile. Go friend him and say "Post The Video, Matt."

Here we go:

Embarrasing Facts That Might Well Be True About Matt Pagel:

1. When Matt was 22, he attempted to set a world record for most consecutive hours doing the Macarena, an attempt which ended after three hours due to "excessive dizziness."

1 comment:

Matt said...

Hi this is Matt! First I will NOT post the video, while I know you would all love to see me in my swim suit, it's not something the world would like to see. Now...about these potential facts, I will check in and correct them, with TRUE facts that are equally amazing...While I didn't try to set the record for the macarana, I did however try to set the record for "sitting on the couch without ever getting up." My friend and I sat on the couch for a total of 18 hours; no bathroom breaks, no naps, just plain sitting. The secret...playing "Bass Fishing" on Nintendo 64. Additional fact..the largest fish we "caught" was 18 lbs, a "world record." :-)