I was pointing out to Sweetie the other day that I'm built sort of like "Mr. Incredible" from "The Incredibles."
Sweetie thought I was being vain and said "Well, doesn't someone have a high impression of himself?"
To which I pointed out that I meant "Mr. Incredible" after he'd stopped being incredible and started being an insurance claims adjuster and sort of gone to pot, with a big belly and tiny legs and overall just looking sort of... pleh.
When Mr. Incredible wanted to get in shape, he went through a whole regimen of fighting robots and bench-pressing railroad trains and stuff. I'd like to do that, too -- but I'm (a) not a superhero, and (b) 40. At 40, it's harder and harder to do the things I want to do, and next to impossible to do the things I'm not so crazy about doing, like exercising.
Still, I try. I went jogging last night, and I swim, and do yoga, and play "Rrowr" monster, and even with all that, I'm still left with my belly-- and the feeling that it's just never going to go away.
So when we were talking one day and someone asked if I'd ever get plastic surgery, I immediately said No, but secretly I was thinking unless they could maybe just suck my stomach away.
And then I found out that there's Cosmetic Surgery Help available from Mya, a site that does all kinds of cosmetic surgery and has FAQ boards and discussion boards and information about the procedures and what they cost and what it's like to go through them and how to choose the right surgeon for you. And suddenly, I'm thinking hey, you know, maybe it's not such a bad thing after all.
Not that I've totally made up my mind or anything. But if I were... were to get some lipsuction done, would it be all bad? I don't know -- but at least I can find out what others went through and what it was like, and I can find out whether it'd be better to travel to get it done right rather than stick around here and have someone screw it up and, I don't know, put more fat in, or something.
Because I'd really rather look like the first version of Mr. Incredible.