Wednesday, September 23, 2009

1001 Ways To Tune Up The World, Number Forty-One.

41. Get the cheapest toothpaste possible, then use the money you save to do some good in the world.

All that hippie stuff from the 60s, combined with those "You can feed a kid for the cost of a cup of coffee ads" abound, and yet nobody thinks to ever simply reduce spending on something we all use and we all overspend on.

In 2008, the "global oral hygiene market," (that's dental floss, denture care, mouthwash, toothpaste and toothbrushes) saw $25 billion in revenues. 58.9% of that was spent on toothpaste. Doing some quick math (carry the one... ) means that $14,725,000,000
was spent on toothpaste, globally, in 2008.

Or, should I say, overspent, since it turns out that in testing, the best of 41 toothpastes was the cheapest one.

Yep. Out of 41 products tested, "Ultrabrite," at $0.28 per ounce, was the best stain remover. All of the toothpastes tested had an acceptable level of fluoride. And, noted the testers, "for plaque removal, how you brush matters more than which toothpaste you use."

The $0.28 per ounce was about 1/10 the most expensive brand. So if we assume (with no real basis for assuming that whatsover, but I'll assume it anyway) that on average, Ultrabrite is 1/2 the cost of all the competition, and if everyone in the world switched to Ultrabrite, then worldwide, we'd have a $7,362,500,000 surplus.

Note: This isn't an ad for Ultrabrite. I don't even use that brand. But I'm gonna' start, once my current tube of "Batman" toothpaste is done. I'm fighting crime AND plaque!

Prior entries:

13. Ban driving any kind of automobile, motorcycle or other personal vehicle within 1-2 miles of downtown in any city with a population of more than 100,000.

12. Abolish gym class; instead, teach kids to play musical instruments.

11. Change copyright laws to allow anyone to use anyone else's creative work provided that the copier pay 60% of the profit to the originator and that the copier not cast the original work in a negative light.

10. Have more sidewalk cafes and outdoor seating.

9. When you have to give someone a gift, ask them what they want, and then get that thing for them.

8. Never interrupt or finish someone's jokes.

7. Periodically, give up something you like for at least a month.

6. Switch to "E-money."

5. Have each person assigned one phone number, and then add an extension for the various phones and faxes that person might be reached at.

4. Abolish Mondays and Tuesdays.

3. Don't listen to interviews with athletes or comedians.

2. Have "personal cashiers" at the grocery store.

1. Don't earn more than $200,000 per year.


lisapepin said...

I'm going to the store today and plan to look for Ultrabrite. I hope they sell it here!

Briane P said...

Did they? Did you make the world a better... and ultrabrite-ier ... place?